Femininity, what is it?

Discussions around Femininity

I am currently having discussions with my 5 year old daughter around identity.

It is such a loaded subject and I am treading very carefully – problem is, there is so much coming in and her sponge like brain is soaking up every drop. When you switch on the TV, advertisers are STILL pushing the old princesses for girls, robots for boys dialogue and it is working on her. She really doesn’t watch alot of TV, but it is everywhere; books, the shops, general conversations…everywhere in big old 2020?

Yes, she is 5 and I get it.

She loves princess stories and dressing up in ball gowns and I support it… because she loves it. I even ask her questions about the fairy / princess stories she is reading and watching on (kids) Youtube – we chat about which ones she likes and which ones she wants to be. Am I comfortable with her obsession with long flowing hair, frilly dresses, glass slippers and floral bouquets?

For now.

At some point, I will need to have a discussion with her about femininity and how much broader it is than just princesses and frocks.

There are levels to this conversation, firstly FEMINITY does not have to look like blonde hair and blue eyes – as a black mother this is a convo that needs to be had as standard. But also, it’s that femininity doesn’t have to look like anything other than what you want it to be.

How I do this is another story.

The real challenge is in redressing the imbalance without making her love of all things frilly seem invalid.

Or maybe I’m making a mountain out of a mole hill? I have no idea.

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